Letters from Emile - page 2

Changing tax

Emile. Illustration by Peewee

There’s an obvious answer to the UK’s decision to stop goods being sent to England without VAT being paid, writes Neil Ross’ Emile in his latest letter to cousin Eugene. But if fulfilment firms do end up moving out, our writer has also thought of a novel way to solve the controversial bus service dilemma...

Gulls and ploys


A class of unruly States members, a black hole that remains unfilled and intensive care for gulls – all part of an average Guernsey month. Neil Ross gets his teeth into all three – and quite a lot more...

Harbouring ambitions

emile 18-9-2011

Building a dock at Longue Hougue big enough to accommodate cruise ships could save £100m. being spent on St Peter Port – and might mean big bucks for our island, writes Neil Ross’ Emile in his latest letter to cousin Eugene. But other ideas – such as uniting with the Crapauds and cutting bus services and postal deliveries – are less welcome...

When the grilles are down


Permitted levels of security apparently all depend on the building. But what do you do when it’s a cliff that’s listed? Neil Ross’ Emile keeps cousin Eugene abreast of what’s been going on in Guernsey...

Charge of the lights brigade


What’s going on when your butter starts collecting air miles like the chief minister? And what would Sir John Doyle think of the traffic lights that are multiplying down Route Militaire? Neil Ross’s Emile gets his teeth into Guernsey’s data day news...

Terminal case

emile 29-6-2011

Moving the airport to the north of the island and taking trash to the Forest would have endless advantages, writes Neil Ross’s Emile – including an answer to UK workers’ accommodation, an end to certain transportation problems, fewer flight cancellations ... and getting one up on Jersey

News, reviews and election blues


Decisions, decisions. They’re never easy. Good thing the States can avoid making them by commissioning a review (or two, or three...) says Neil Ross’s old friend Emile

Mind how you go

(Illustration by Peewee)

A few inches of snow and every child in the island is out, careering down hills on tea trays. Good job Education closed all the schools to keep them safe, says Neil Ross’ old friend Emile...

Guernsey States all over the shop

(Illustration by Peewee)

Granite walls that are ‘out of keeping’ with Guernsey and a former shop that’s apparently not a shop. For an island whose government has a problem making independent decisions, there’s a few odd ones turning up, says Neil Ross’s friend Emile

Torteval’s scarecrows confusion for Google


CHER Eugene, Well, I suppose we’re to the end of our summer now, us, with all the schools gone back, eh? That means you must be starting summer on your side of the world then, eh, mon vieux?

Plane talking? You must be joking...


Cher Eugene, You know I’ve said you wouldn’t recognise the island if you came back now, mon vieux? Well, I was thinking, me, there’s one thing that’s still the same. The States debates, eh?

Beanjar and cider are a match for vuvuzelas

emile 13-7-2010

My wonderful Cher Eugene, I told you Guernsey’s changed a lot from how she used to be, eh? Well, you’ll never guess the latest, mon vieux. We’re going to be able to choose our own Lt-Governor now, eh?