An inconvenient truth
IT'S time to raise a campaigning banner for a large, important but frequently ignored group of islanders – those of us with weak bladders.
IT'S time to raise a campaigning banner for a large, important but frequently ignored group of islanders – those of us with weak bladders.
There are thousands of us and we are only going to grow in number as life expectancy increases.
It's time our deputies realised that our votes can't be taken for granted.
If they think that closing public toilets is an easy way to balance the books, then they may just find their political careers going down the pan.
The news that one public convenience – the clue is in the name – has been shut and that the future of others is under review is a real worry.
Those of us cursed with low retentive powers will be crossing our fingers – and our legs – that this closure is not the start of a chain reaction.
Of course, in the present circumstances all options for saving taxpayers' money must be looked at. After all, the States is not exactly flush.
It must look at all possible ways to reduce demands on the public purse and divert limited resources into more important areas, but balancing the books by closing/charging for public loos really is scraping the bottom of the barrel.
Perhaps there may be a rarely-used public toilet in some deserted corner of our crowded island that would be no loss, but I doubt it. One of the understated ways in which Guernsey is much more civilised than the UK – and many other countries – is in having genuinely convenient conveniences.
As for pay-loos, they are a real pain if you don't have the right coins to hand. And how much income will they really generate?
At 20p a go, it would take 500 visits to raise a mere £100.
I suspect at this rate it would take quite a while just to pay for the equipment.
There is also something rather perverse about a society that regards it as unacceptable to charge motorists a modest charge for long-stay parking but that is happy to extort cash from little old ladies caught short while waiting for the bus.
I really am not attacking those who are reviewing this area of spending. They have a job to do and every possible economy must be considered.
I am just sad that such a pettifogging, surface-scratching idea appears to be near the top of the list of possible States savings.
What is needed is an examination of those things that could make a real difference.
Why on earth does a small community like Guernsey need 10 fully-fledged government departments?
Seven would be plenty and that would save on the number of chief officers, PAs, minute-takers and so on.
If they don't know how to achieve such a rationalisation, then 'Tribal-Roffey Consultants' come very cheaply.
If we're really reaching the point when basic services such as lavatories are unaffordable, then how can the States justify keeping more primary school places than the island needs or pumping massive subsidies into private education?
If a real, significant reduction in public spending is needed, then it will only be achieved by the States employing fewer people – not one more to empty the coins out of the pay-slots in our public toilets.
This really is a classic case of fiddling while Rome burns.
However, if the States prefers to concentrate on small gestures over public spending – rather than implementing big, meaningful initiatives – that's fine.
I can suggest an alternative nit-picking programme of spending cuts in lieu of taking away public conveniences.
Although I am hopping mad at this spiteful little gesture, I'll accept that keeping our public toilets open really is unaffordable when – and only when – our States members cut out their jollies.
No more long-distance flights to CPA conferences.
I think the next is due to be in Kenya and the rules used to say they can fly business class if the flight is longer than a few hours.
No more spending hundreds of thousands of pounds on security for meaningless British-Irish Council Meetings.
When these fripperies have been done way with, then I might take seriously the idea that we have to consider closing, or charging for, public toilets.
Sometimes our States is enough to drive you round the bend.One public toilet has already been closed and the future of others is being considered by the States.
