The self-promotion gender gap

WHILE rummaging through some old paperwork this week during a rare attempt to tidy up, I found one of the first CVs that I wrote as an enthusiastic young student in 1997.

Ever the diligent soul, I had sent it with a letter to my parents asking them to review it for me and give me some feedback. Specifically, I wrote: ...I’ve added my language skills as ‘ fluent French and good working knowledge of German’. That way my German may [underlined] surprise them but at least I won’t mess up – I just don’t feel I can justify ‘ fluent German’.

Let’s set the scene. I was 21 years old and studying French and German at Cambridge University. It’s fair to say my language skills at that time were excellent by any standards. My German was definitely fluent and I had the exam grades to back that up. So why on earth was I not confident selling my skills? Why was I so worried about failure or overselling myself?

This was not the last time I would ponder how to describe my language skills and it was certainly the first of many times I would question my own capability and suitability for a job or role I was considering, preferring to play it down and surprise on the upside rather than ‘oversell’ myself, as I saw it, or in some cases to not even apply if I felt it was beyond me. As a result of this habit, I have many times undersold my skills and who knows how many times I was not even invited to interview as a result, despite being more than capable of the role advertised.

I know I am not alone in this and the only other examples of this I have found have been with female friends. In fact, you’ve probably heard the following well quoted statistic before: Men apply for a job when they meet only 60% of the qualifications, but women apply only if they meet 100% of them.

The finding comes from a Hewlett Packard internal report and has been interpreted in many different ways over the years. There are many men who no doubt feel the same but it seems to be more of an issue for women; how we present ourselves does not always truly represent what we can offer.

I have become more confident over time as my career has developed and the risk of failure has shrunk. Earlier in my career I stuck more firmly to these guidelines but at what cost? What does it take to build confidence at a younger age in women?

Women are not as great at promoting themselves full stop. I know I am generalising here as Madonna, Oprah and Taylor Swift do a pretty good job of it, for example, but many of us feel uncomfortable with selling ourselves, particularly in male-dominated environments, and we are likely to be less visible overall, partly due to lack of representation and partly due to how we value our personal contributions and this serves to compound the problem.

Evidence shows that women typically tend towards promoting the success of their teams rather than their own personal contributions, while men tend to do the opposite. This may well have roots in how our traditional gender roles were set up, with men as breadwinners and women as homemakers, effectively keeping the family team in the best possible form. Life has moved on but it seems we haven’t entirely adapted when it comes to work and careers.

I don’t really want to promote myself by emphasising my achievements, I am not comfortable doing it and find it hard enough in interviews. I do, however, want to be recognised for my input and my skills and I am not alone in this. I want to be in roles where I can add value and learn and grow and contribute to a team effort. Many of my professional friends and colleagues encounter similar frustrations.

This is why it is so important that women continue to be visible everywhere and that we get more creative about the ways we ask people to speak up. I am more comfortable in small groups, for example, discussing issues in depth rather than presenting to a large room where I get limited feedback; others prefer writing to speaking or need time to prepare themselves and don’t think as well on their feet. The key thing is that everyone excels in different environments.

Job advertisements which focus on the core skills required rather than just specific experience will attract a broader range of candidates. If those skills required speak to people’s values, all the better. I am more likely to apply for roles where I can already see a strong female presence and to want to join boards where the team is already reasonably balanced and makes clear statements about being inclusive and wanting to hear a range of different opinions.

Making changes like this doesn’t just help women, it helps anyone who does not like to shout about their achievements from the rooftops or who might be prone to understating their skills or self-selecting themselves out of recruitment processes before they have even started. This approach also attracts different personality types with different ways of thinking, all vital in building successful teams.

In a study conducted by American academics Christine Exley and Judd B. Kessler, they concluded that women were less likely to self-promote even when they clearly performed better than others.

‘In every setting we explored, we observed a substantial gender gap in self-promotion: women systematically provided less favourable assessments of their own past performance and potential future ability than equally performing men,’ they found.

We all need to get better at highlighting the achievements of our female friends, family members and colleagues in front of others, particularly at work. We just don’t do it enough and it is not second nature to many women.

Reminding the group of key points raised by all group members in meetings can really help redress this balance. Making sure to credit the person who referred you or gave you assistance or advice can really help with this.

I know many highly influential women on this island who are reluctant to demand recognition and whose input is often overlooked yet deserves acknowledgement.

Managers also need to be aware of this and work hard to notice who is doing the work and reward appropriately. I worked in far too many environments in my early career in which he who shouted the loudest (it most often was a he) got paid the most, regardless of the sales figures or client feedback, and it was not long before I left to find more equitable environments in which I felt more valued.

As for the rest of us, it’s time to rewrite those CVs and take a risk when we feel we have something to offer.